How does imagining your agreement to part or all of what the person said make you feel? Does it leave you feeling awful about yourself or empowered because you have taken control of the conversation? Do you feel optimistic because you now have the opportunity to develop this aspect of your behavior for the better or do you feel overwhelmed? How do you imagine your agreeing with elements of the criticism would have impacted the conversation?

 

It’s worth bearing in mind that if agreeing with criticism leaves you feeling awful about yourself you may have an underlying self-esteem issue whereby you either feel any weakness translates into having less worth or where you cannot accept weaknesses because it is too threatening to your identity. If you feel awful when you recognize possessing a weakness please read my Tiny Buddha article on self-esteem titled ‘Learning to Love Yourself; 3 Steps to Instantly Boost Your Self-Esteem’.

 

If on the other hand you cannot accept having any weaknesses (and again, the example you used may have been malicious criticism in which case no weakness or truth may have been involved) it might be worth taking the narcissism quiz and, if your score is high, reading ‘Narcissism’ by Alexander Lowen which is a self-help book for the recovering narcissist.

 

Do you find accepting weaknesses difficult? Does it impact your self-esteem or do you find it hard because it affects your sense of identity? Please share your thoughts in the comments below to gain encouragement, insight and support from our community, we’d love to hear from you.