Resilience (series)

The Resilience Remedy; How to Bounce Back From Tough Times Fast Part Four

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock


Last week we looked at behaviors and beliefs to help us build up our resilience, this week we discover the last fundamental steps in order to foster greater resilience.


Invest In Relationships


Almost all of the resilient people I know invest in their relationships with family and friends. They know that when tough times hit these are the people who will rally around and sustain you. It’s so important to nurture your relationships, it boosts your emotional health and ensures you have a strong support network you can call on no matter what you may be going through. For more on creating and maintaining deep nourishing friendships please read my article titled ‘Why Building Strong Friendships is Important for Our Health’.


Ask For Help


One of the things resilient people do really well is to ask for help when they are facing trials. They openly share the cause of their distress with their friends and family so they receive the support that they need. Such help and support is vital to anyone who is going through a rocky period and the strength it offers you will be indispensable in handling your troubles. Similarly, they seek out help in the form of therapy and mentors when they feel they need additional support and encouragement.


Be Brave and Have Courage


True bravery is not in the absence of fear but in conquering fear when it presents itself and that takes courage. Having the courage to confront what scares you will foster greater levels of inner strength, increasing your confidence that no matter what comes your way you will be able to deal with it.


The Resilience Remedy; How to Bounce Back From Tough Times Fast Part Three

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock


Last week we explored what to do to prevent set backs and breakdowns and looked at some behaviors and beliefs to increase our resilience. This week we continue in our quest to boost our resilience.


Have Healthy Habits


Adopting healthy habits is one of the quickest ways to boost your lust for life and even better it helps to reduce stress, anxiety and low mood. Eating loads of fruit and veg, drinking plenty of water and exercising at least three times a week will strengthen your resilience tenfold. Sleep is equally important and it’s vital that you get at least eight hours rest most nights. For more on exercise please read my article titled ‘New Year, New You: How to Exercise Your Way to Wellbeing’ and if you have trouble getting enough sleep I would check out Sleepio, a fantastic CBT based online course.


Knowing Your Reason Why


Having a clear reason why will both motivate and inspire you to lead a life of passion and, if tough times hit, will encourage you to keep going. For example, I chose to turn my breakdown into an opportunity to share what helped me. This reason why and purpose has given me direction at times when I would have otherwise been lost.


Plan Ahead and Be Prepared


Planning ahead is one of the best things we can do to ensure we approach life successfully. Being strategic in this way not only increases our chances of a positive outcome but streamlines life’s complexity into an organized flow. Having a backup plan if things go awry is also key so any curveballs can be navigated with ease. Ultimately, by planning ahead and being prepared, you will feel more in control which is critical when increasing your resilience.


For more on both problem solving please read my article titled ‘How to navigate any problem with ease’ and for more on creating goals please see my article titled ‘How to turn your dreams into reality’ – these two articles will walk you through calmly facing life’s obstacles and the process of creating goals which will help you to tailor your problem solving in a way that breaks things down into logical manageable steps as with any goal.


The Resilience Remedy; How to Bounce Back From Tough Times Fast Part Two

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock


Last week we discovered the signs to look out for when we are at risk of a set back or a breakdown. This week we look at what to do to reduce the severity of either a set back or a breakdown and how we can begin building up our resilience pro-actively.


What to do to if you are showing any of the signs listed in last Monday’s series post and how to prevent things getting worse


If you are or do experience any of the risky signs that you are headed for a breakdown I cannot emphasize enough how vital it is that you seek professional help by both going to your doctor and a therapist. Please go to the UKCP (UK residents) or APA (American residents) sites which have ‘search for a therapist’ facilities on both websites. If for whatever reason you cannot seek professional help in the form of therapy (and please do absolutely everything you can to make it possible) I would recommend visiting your doctor and potentially getting him or her to sign you off work for stress.


If you are suffering from anxiety, depression or stress to whatever degree I would also encourage you to look through my best resources page which is packed with excellent CBT based free online courses – all of which are recommended by top therapists. Likewise, my  further reading page has some amazingly good CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) based books which are recommended by top therapists and will help you on your journey to recovery more than you could imagine.


Similarly, if you are suffering with stress I would also highly recommend reading my CBT based stress management article titled ‘Tis’ The Season to be Stressed; How to Leave Stress Behind You for Good’ which holds true no matter what time of year and could substantially reduce your stress levels. It explains exactly what to do when you feel overwhelmed and goes into detail as to how to reduce your demands and increase your resources which should result in a considerable reduction in stress.


But how can we develop greater resilience as a preventative measure against future upsets? In the passages below I have outlined the tools for resilience that I discovered in therapy and have also added several additional tools and beliefs that I have adopted since beginning my own personal development journey. All of the tools helped me develop high levels of resilience and I am positive they will help your resilience soar to new heights so you can quickly get back on track when hard times hit.



The Resilience Remedy; How to Bounce Back From Tough Times Fast Part One

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock


I’m a firm believer that when you need to learn a lesson, life throws challenges your way highlighting what you need to learn until you have no option but to learn it. Having been depressed since five because of bullying I was constantly dealing with challenges which, in later life, caused me to have a breakdown. It was as if life was trying to point me in the direction of the coping mechanisms I needed in order to live a happy, productive and meaningful life.


After each episode of depression I continuously failed to change my coping mechanisms and life strategy, so life just threw bigger and bigger challenges my way until my breakdown caused me to hit rock bottom and take stock of my life. And, as it turned out, rock bottom was the best thing to ever happen to me. It made me sit up and finally pay attention to life’s signs that how I was trying to cope wasn’t working. I got the help I needed by going to therapy which gave me invaluable life skills that would stay with me and steer me back on course to where I was meant to be.


Therapy provided me with strategies to monitor what caused my setbacks so I could effectively predict when I was most at risk and use my newfound skills to help prevent setbacks preemptively, or if that wasn’t possible, reduce both the severity and length of them. In short, therapy taught me resilience and how to bounce back from tough times fast.