leaving sadness behind you

Letting Go and Moving On; How to Get Unstuck and Step into A Bright Future Part Four

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

 

So far in the series we have covered the first three steps to letting go and moving on, these being:

 

  1. Recognize how your actions are contributing to your pain
  2. Force yourself to socialize
  3. Take up hobbies

 

This week we look at the final two steps, specifically creating goals and imagining a happy, meaningful and fulfilling future.

 

Create goals

 

Creating goals was critical in helping me to design a happy future, after creating several goals I suddenly felt excited for what the future held again. Creating goals is literally the process of turning your dreams into reality – who on earth wouldn’t be excited by that prospect?

 

Very soon I was running my first 5k for charity, skydiving, passing my driving test and landing my first managerial job!

 

If you would like to discover how to create meaningful, realistic and achievable goals, please read my article ‘How to Turn Your Dreams into Reality’ and begin creating the wonderful future you have always dreamed about.

 

Imagine a happy, meaningful and fulfilling future

 

Once I had set goals this step became much easier but I continued to actively look for ways to develop my positivity further. I read personal development books and looked for people whose life story inspired me. I watched TED Talks of people who had overcome seemingly insurmountable obstacles triumphantly. I signed up for Facebook groups which posted daily positive picture quotes. I stopped reading and watching the news which filled my mind with needless negativity. I had visualization sessions in my room with candles and chill out music, imagining how I would achieve all my goals.

 

If you would like to explore how you can foster a more positive outlook, helping you to imagine a happy, meaningful and fulfilling future, please read my article titled ‘How to Avoid A Negative Downward Spiral by Using the Power of Positivity’.

 

The world is full of infinite possibilities just waiting to be discovered by you. All you have to do is follow these steps and in so doing create a life you love, one that is filled with meaning and beauty and is the source of unimaginable joy. So don’t allow your pain to put your life on pause any longer, hit play and step into your future today!

 

Further resources:

 

‘Clearing Emotional Clutter: Mindfulness Practices for Letting Go of What’s Blocking Your Fulfillment and Transformation’ by Donald Altman

This book uses a mindfulness based approach to letting go and moving on.

 

‘The Secret to Letting Go and Moving On’ by Joff Day (Kindle version)

This book uses a psychological based approach to letting go and moving on.

 

‘When the past won’t let you go: find the healing that lets you move on’ by H Norman Wright

This book uses a spiritual approach to letting go and moving on.

 

Stay tuned – next month’s hot topic is ‘Finding Your Inner Zen; How to Realize a Work / Life Balance’.

 

Did you enjoy this month’s series? What was your number one takeaway? What steps do you plan to put into practice? Please share your thoughts in the comments below to gain encouragement, insight and support from our community, we’d love to hear from you.

Letting Go and Moving On; How to Get Unstuck and Step into A Bright Future Part Three

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

 

Last week we explored the ways in which we may be contributing to our pain and the notion that socializing – even when we don’t feel like it – helps us to feel more supported and can even work as a stepping stone to moving on. For me, when I started socializing and having more fun I realized that there was a happy life awaiting me once I truly let go.

 

This week we examine the third step which is very often overlooked but plays a vital role in letting go and moving on.

 

Take up hobbies

 

Once I was socializing more and my spirits had begun to lift I threw myself into taking up hobbies and interests. I read more, I went to creative writing classes, I started this blog and I even drew up my 40 before 40 bucket list! This helped me express myself creatively which brought me joy and satisfaction whilst allowing me view my future with excitement and optimism.

 

If you would like to rediscover your creativity, please read my article titled ‘How to Design A More Fulfilled Life By Being Creative in 6 Simple Steps’.

 

Excerpt:

 

Types of creative activities

 

Once you’ve developed your creativity by following the steps you can decide how to be creative. Below I have listed a wide range of creative activities, choose the one that appeals to you the most and begin your creative journey today!

 

  • Pottery
  • Sculpting
  • Photography
  • Gardening
  • Painting (watercolour, oil, acrylic)
  • Drawing (pencil, pen, pastels, charcoal)
  • Writing non-fiction
  • Creative writing
  • Writing poetry
  • Song writing
  • Singing
  • Playing an instrument
  • Composing music
  • Dancing
  • Acting
  • Sewing
  • Knitting
  • Card making
  • Calligraphy
  • Scrapbooking
  • Origami and quilling
  • Jewellery making
  • Mosaics (E.g. mirror frames, tables, pots)
  • Cake decorating

 

To me creativity is self-expression in its truest form. There is an innate beauty in the gardener who eloquently expresses how she sees nature, the writer who uses the perfect combination of words to convey his ideas or the photographer who captures the moment flawlessly. These are just some of the beautiful ways creativity communicates our unique view of the world, the very essence of who we are. Begin celebrating your own wondrous individuality by fostering more creativity in your life and embark on a new, more fulfilling life today.

 

Further resources:

 

‘Clearing Emotional Clutter: Mindfulness Based Practices for Letting Go of What’s Blocking Your Fulfillment and Transformation’ by Donald Altman

This book uses a mindfulness based approach to letting go and moving on.

 

‘The Secret to Letting Go and Moving On’ by Joff Day (Kindle version)

This book uses a psychological based approach to letting go and moving on.

 

‘When the past won’t let you go: find the healing that lets you move on’ by H Norman Wright

This book uses a spiritual approach to letting go and moving on.

 

Stay tuned – next week we examine the two extremely important last steps to letting go and moving on.

 

Do you think you would find expressing yourself creatively fulfilling? Were there any activities on the list that you definitely wouldn’t try? Do you have any ideas for possible creative pass times that I have missed? Please share your thoughts in the comments below to gain encouragement, insight and support from our community, we’d love to hear from you.

Letting Go and Moving On; How to Get Unstuck and Step into A Bright Future Part Two

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

 

Last week we explored the notion that sometimes our pain can be familiar and comforting. This week we look at the first two steps to let go and move on so that your future is full of possibility.

 

Accepting the situation you are in and seeing it for what it is

 

When I was struggling to move on I wallowed in what might have been. After several failed attempts at reconciliation I felt more miserable and, rather than accepting it was over, chose to ruminate over memories. I knew my behavior was destructive but at the same time I wanted to hold onto those happy memories, somehow I felt that moving on equated to giving up and losing hope.

 

When I did begin to move on I did so by telling myself that, no matter what I believed, it wasn’t meant to be. I had to accept that I was mistaken. This was the one truth I had desperately tried to avoid and, as they say in psychology, what you resist, persists.

 

For you it might be that rather than accepting it wasn’t meant to be you need to accept that it shouldn’t be and see the situation as it really is. This can also be extremely hard, especially when we need to acknowledge when someone we love is treating us without respect, care or consideration.

 

I think the reason this is often so hard is that by admitting they are treating us badly, we not only have to see them as human (and take them down from any potential pedestals we put them on) but we also have to admit we were wrong about them, which brings a unique kind of pain in its own right.

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Letting Go and Moving On; How to Get Unstuck and Step into A Bright Future Part One

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock

 

At the times in my life when I couldn’t face moving on the festive period was especially hard. Harmonious relationships and joyous times flooding the television, portraying a perfect, happy and uncomplicated life only accentuated my pain. This often triggered my thinking back – very much through rose tinted lenses – to my romanticized past.

 

Of course the holidays can bring up old memories but what I am referring to is a year round state of pain and its associated paralysis, leaving you unable to move past it, with the holidays just making the notion of moving on even harder.

 

It took me six years to get over my first encounter with romance. I remember agonizing over the pain, the fact that it was the only thing linking us in the present both comforting and familiar. Although I don’t believe in regrets, I look back at that time in my life and want to shake my younger self until I saw sense.

 

Not only did I romanticize the past but I failed to see how I was actively contributing to my misery in the present. And to make things worse I had shut myself off from meeting anyone new.

 

My friends all told me to let go and move on but I had no idea how.

 

Quite by accident I took five important steps which allowed me to release myself from my imprisonment in the past and step into to my future with a happy heart and plenty of hope. If you want to move past the pain, these steps can help you create a life full of joy, laughter and happiness.

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