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Friendships; Why Regular Contact Is Key

Lets face it, everyone has a different idea about how much personal time they like to spend away from their friends. Whilst socializing strengthens our resilience and builds up our resources in times of stress, it doesn’t mean that spending all your spare time with friends is necessary or even desirable.


Incidentally, if you are going through a period of stress, you will be less likely to want to see your friends. In this instance I would recommend you see them as much as possible – despite your inclination otherwise – as it will increase your resources which is essential for stress management.


Ultimately everyone has different comfort levels when it comes to socializing and what feels right for one friend may not for another. For example, your married friend may like to spend less time socializing and might not want to socialize in exactly the same way. In this case finding middle ground is key – perhaps socializing over a coffee would work well.


However much time you like to spend socializing it’s important to connect with your friends in whatever capacity regularly to maintain and nurture the bond you share. A quick text asking how they are or how the Halloween party went the other night shows you care and maintains a healthy rapport. Phone calls or Skype also serve to strengthen relations when face to face contact isn’t possible. The key thing to remember is that just because you may not meet with them regularly you can still contact them often, showing them you value their friendship and they are in your thoughts.


How often do you see your friends? Do you enjoy spending time alone? How does this impact upon the time you spend with friends? Do you have any friends who are in different life stages to you? How has this changed the dynamic of the friendship? Please share your thoughts in the comments below to gain encouragement, support and insight from our community, we’d love to hear from you.

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