When role playing your responses to put downs, did you feel more in control of the direction of the conversation? How did the role play make you feel? How did it help you? Thinking about the role play in this way will enable you to
When role playing your responses to put downs, did you feel more in control of the direction of the conversation? How did the role play make you feel? How did it help you? Thinking about the role play in this way will enable you to
This is your opportunity to practice all the amazing things you would have said if you had thought of them in the moment (don’t worry very few of us do have an immediate reply to put downs). Remember the key is to stand up for yourself
Think back to a put down you received and go through what you would have liked to have said to them (HINT: Aim for an assertive response and avoid aggressive or sarcastic retorts). This can be a frustrating exercise but it’s worthwhile as tomorrow you get
Last week we examined how to distance ourselves from defensiveness, this week we explore the strategy of asking questions, a technique called negative inquiry. Ask Questions; Negative Inquiry This can be scary at first but it does get much easier with practice. Ask questions to better understand what
Malicious criticism usually takes the form of a planned and deliberate conversation and is easily enough exposed but what should you do when you receive an off the cuff put down? The tricky thing about put downs is that they often come by surprise and
If someone is criticizing you and you are not being defensive and keeping an open mind it doesn’t mean that you are a walkover or that you will necessarily agree with them. Indeed, there are times when criticism is strictly unfounded, malicious and entirely nonconstructive. By
Lets just say that in my experience constructive criticism can be like a sheep in wolfs clothing. What may appear to be a personal assault might actually be a valid criticism and worth taking on board. There are many reasons why constructive criticism can sound and
List how role playing being less defensive made you feel – did you feel more vulnerable? Perhaps less hurt? More receptive? Did your emotional reaction to the role play surprise you? How do you think your emotional reaction to the role play prepared you on an
Keep the example you selected yesterday in mind and role play with someone close to you how you could have handled it better using the three steps of how to distance yourself from defensiveness listed in Monday’s series post. You might be self-conscious during role
List a time you received criticism and took it badly and visualize in great detail what happened and how it made you feel. What time did you remember? Do you believe the criticism was constructive or malicious? How did you react? Please share your thoughts in
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